Ode to Malta

Oh, Malta,
Sunny limestone rock,
Ochre landscape,
Glowing at sunset.

Oh, Malta,
No trees, no forests,
No mountains, no rivers,
Just buildings and sea.

Oh, Malta,
Blue, teal and turquoise,
Sunburn tourists,
Painful rocky beaches.

Oh, Malta,
Quaint old buildings,
Narrow bumpy pavements,
Rubbish on the street.

Oh, Malta,
Ladies with long nails,
Drawn thick eyebrows,
Short loud men.

Oh, Malta,
Bizarre loud language,
Funny English accent,
Lots of swearing.

Oh, Malta,
Hellish traffic,
Crazy bus drivers,
Unpunctuality.

Oh, Malta,
Fruit and veg vans,
Greasy street food,
Convenience shops.

Oh, Malta,
Pastizzi, Rabbit,
Ftira, Twistees,
Kinnie, Cisk.

Oh, Malta,
Nowhere else to go,
A ferry to Gozo,
But the Azure Window is gone.